of anything non-Left has long troubled me. Pre-internet, I thought it was my imagination. Twitter et al soon disabused me of that notion. And it’s not just hatred of non-Left policies but hatred of actual people who have even right of centre views. The Latin word for left may well be apt. Because that is what it seems to me to be – sinister. Continue reading
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for Udemy – a lengthy task taking the best part of September – served as an apt reminder to weed my own mind and re-lay some foundation goals again. Other people might enhance life but they also frequently contribute to detouring from spiritual purpose. Not that I am back to optimum state – not by a long chalk. And said ‘other people’ seem determined to create disharmony either on a local scale (neighbours’ parking, housing developers…) or on a much grander scale (best not to think of those right now!).As part of my mind weeding, I am back to thought swapping again (replace one idea with another) …after turning down the inner emotional volume. It’s the emotions stirred which can be a complete beast to control, even with meditation. Like with V next door moving her car, like B, to a space that others could use despite having her own private area. With K, that makes them the three witches of sheer bloodymindedness!
You want instant fixes – or at least I do – even if it is spiritual indifference or a burst of unshakeable faith. I remember the times, I could meditate and there would be a result of some description in minutes or hours at most. Now, everything seems to take rather longer – as if that was the teaser and now this is the real test (of faith).
Meanwhile, the balance of harmonious people seems to be currently outweighed by the disharmonious so I fully expect there to be cataclysms that shake up the world order. (I’m talking grander rather than local scale here. I need to live here a while longer so have to figure out other ways to deal with these selfish people).
On top of that, Edwina’s house has finally been sold – but to someone who plans to rent it out. Am working on believing the best and I may be lucky and will get decent people. It really depends on whether I have further spiritual lessons to learn I expect.
The new buyer’s builders were supposed to be there last week (for 3 weeks) so I ended up racing through the videos and audios for my course on Udemy to avoid background noise of hammering and drilling. It means the quality is not as good as I would have liked but then the price is also much lower than I would have liked too. Even stevens!
There are rather too many challenges right now but I feel relatively optimistic. That’s where checking my previous notes has come in useful. Everything passes. This is just a crappy moment in time.
Even in the 90s, when there was so much to despair about, I achieved whatever it was I wanted to achieve. I sometimes wish I had stretched myself a bit more when I could. I will be able to again, hopefully soon, but it is hard not to have the occasional regret.
For now, my mind is focused on the illusory – as it is in heaven.
If you are reading this, do please check out my course and spread the word too. Thanks!
PS Have decided to paint for me again. Apart from Wise El cartoons and illustrations.
Art is informed by the life we lead, by our thoughts, experiences and desires. My blog posts are either streams of consciousness, wrestling with spiritual concepts or other experiences on this particular spiritual journey. For examples of how this translates into my art, please visit my gallery.
Profit From Unlimited Thinking is a five-part course in creative thinking and managing change.
All my books are available from Amazon.co.uk and Amazon.com or to order from all good booksellers. Euphrosene Labon Mind Body Spirit Artist Author Writer
tasking my mind yet again. It’s partly because I have been working so hard on Wise El’s Big Thoughts, and the usual Gethsemane theme has been popping into my head: “I’m not as sure/ As when we started/ Then, I was inspired/ Now I’m sad and tired/… / Would the things I’ve said and done matter any more?”
Meaning, of course, my art and books and all the sacrifices I’ve made to get to this point – rather more than three years!
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I doubt anyone is going to do more than crucify me verbally should I enjoy a high public profile. But I – all mystics – have this ongoing argument with our God. It’s the nature of the spiritual struggle. We want to know if this ‘blood, sweat and tears’ is going to bear the right fruit. However, we are told to ‘let go and let God’; to surrender; to allow. But, most of all, to accept whatever happens as the will of God.Yet, we are of God; we each are aspects of God – the Wakan Tanka, the Great Everything, the Source. What vibrates within us is of God, it is our divine message. If that message becomes confused or misunderstood, it is because we have ceased to hear correctly. We have spent too much time with the mass mind and not enough with the still small voice within.
Sadly, for some of us, this often creates a spiritual aloneness. As I have mentioned before, many mystics write of their divine love deserting them, not speaking to them. Mystical parlance for God not responding for days, months and even years.
It is absolutely nothing to do with manifesting more art or book sales or perfect health or someone to love or whatever other earthly things we would like to make the human experience more palatable.
I do not know why God, the God within each and every one of us, sometimes responds promptly and frequently, and at other times seems completely deaf for the longest time. Yet we are not separate from our God. It is the spark which gives us life thus we cannot be apart.
(Yes, I know atheists disagree. Tough. This is my blog and it’s what I believe!)
All this is something which only a more mystically-inclined soul could understand. It makes it difficult to talk of fear (ie the fear of not hearing one’s God; of not fulfilling one’s spiritual purpose; of wondering – paraphrasing the words of Gethsemane – would what I have written and painted matter any more) without being misunderstood on a different level. It’s like going round and round in circles and arriving exactly where one started out.
No wonder I feel ‘Gethsemane fear’ that all my work will not matter. If so, then why bother? And once you go down that road, it becomes why bother with the process of living as well.
One of the qualities I like about myself just so happens to be one that manages to irritate or upset those of a more sensitive nature: that of being to the point – or, as Dad used to say, being ‘blunt’.
Talking round the houses only causes more confusion or people choose to interpret inaccurately. Or just see and hear what they want to see and hear – even if it is patently not correct. I had that with the NandDs and it used to drive me to distraction. That is why I am quite forceful when I correct a wrong. Cause and effect means I then have yet more fallout to deal with – which is preferable to being misinterpreted, I suppose.
Tomorrow is my Diamond and a Half anniversary. And how has the year gone so far?
Well the last week of July is about par for the course – so far: “What a week it’s been! Car being pranged (neck sore for two days, having to get estimate from garage in Goring), kitchen taps being replaced, bathroom sink plug conking out (a kind of plunger-thing which stopped staying plunged – now fixed), then the pipe under the bathroom sink leaking (washer now replaced), getting a humongous tax bill but speaking to the lovely Linda at HMRC and having it equally massively reduced (phew), learning how to backup and upgrade my WordPress site then getting a new NextGen upgrade which sent everything art-related totally haywire, while all the time it rained or was a grey as an MP’s soul.
In the entire week, I inked about five Wise El cartoons and am again horribly behind schedule. My soul yearns to paint something but hours can go by on just one tiny piece so I’m not picking up a paint brush until I have Wise El’s Big Thoughts done and dusted.
Any plans I had for marketing them individually (as opposed to all within a book) have veered off-course again. Not because of the website hiccups, but because of what would be effective in the longer term….”
Perhaps the next six months will show a bit more promise?
[Just seen in my Twitter feed: “Solitary mystics are the most connected individuals.”- Jon Mundy]
Art is informed by the life we lead, by our thoughts, experiences and desires. My blog posts are either streams of consciousness, wrestling with spiritual concepts or other experiences on this particular spiritual journey. For examples of how this translates into my art, please visit my gallery.
Profit From Unlimited Thinking is a five-part course in creative thinking and managing change.
All my books are available from Amazon.co.uk and Amazon.com or to order from all good booksellers. Euphrosene Labon Mind Body Spirit Artist Author Writer