Wednesday 13: Live in the now? Preferably not. The (small) Premium Bond win is pleasant, of course, but there is a howling gale which exfoliated my face in Worthing this morning, pondering Ma´s future, sibling grumbling, and now the council has sent a letter to nine houses including me, about a sewer obstruction. Someone had complained. Who? My flow is fine.
I have an ultra sensitive sense of smell and I can smell nothing horrible inside or outside (well linseed oil inside this room). I even went out in the howling gale to check the other houses mentioned - and stuck my head out of the back bedroom window (twice - sniffing the air like a demented feline). And still I cannot smell anything pongsome except in one person´s home. The one who thinks there is something wrong with my sense of smell.
Yet, if we do not arrange for the blockage to be cleared within 48 hours Arun District Council will do it and charge us for the costs. The presumption is that they will be more expensive than if we get together and find a cheaper alternative.
But why are we taking on trust that it IS the private sewer that is at fault? I have emailed the housing surveyor who sent the letter, for proof that it is down to us as it seems all they have done is taken the `complaint´ of an unknown someone. So why should I fork out for something on such flimsy evidence?
The neighbour said two men were `walking around´ with a drain firm and genuinely thinks that is sufficient for me to cough up, that I should take their word for it alone. Why? The surveyor certainly mentions nothing apart from a complaint being brought to their attention. Well a little more information would help first. Thanks.
Meanwhile, I gather there are some techy issues too but they are not currently affecting me. So what was that about living in the now? Right now I want to project my thoughts to somewhere harmonious where all issues big and small are resolved.
Pity the marketing idiot who made the mistake of calling right in the middle of this. His ear was definitely flushed out.
Later: no matter what fun and games (ha!) happen during the day, I always make time to rebalance my soul in some way. As I have been mentioning Tolle, Oprah and living in the now, I googled on their webinars from earlier this year. And, once again, it is all rather talky but little real pragmatic mysticism - for me, at any rate. Webinar 10 is now playing in my ears as I type, and it really does seem as opaque as the books.
Yet, even when I am yelling down the `phone at inopportune cold calls or refusing to pay blindly for something without checking the facts, there are always a good few cells within which are tuned to my bit of God. So to me, `now´ means involving my God self in some way. Even berating, like Tevye if necessary ie not ignoring my God.
Sometimes, a particular annoyance might need more conscious effort with mental stillness, but, most of the time, I feel something giving me whatever it is I need. And that something is, to me, my God.
I do think (from this small bit I have heard) that he may have missed a salient point in divine potential - the ability to use it for good *or ill*. That is the paradox of God, where time and space work out cause and effect.
Sure we can and should all work for a new more harmonious whole (totality) but consciousness of our inner self gives us the wherewithal to deal with life´s slings and arrows. It does not get rid of them, precisely because we are all part of the whole - with every individual´s actions rippling on another´s in some way. The only way we can handle other people, and it is a real mental discipline to achieve, is to focus on that inner stillness or awareness. Never the issue or the problem people.
By the way, it was St Teresa who prayed the `everything passes´. Will put the full quote in the forum.
PS I do love everyone. I just don’t LIKE many!
